she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize