My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
