When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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