dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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