She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
This is my gift to your gina
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
