eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
