Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
