No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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