ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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