Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
wow bdsm is so cute
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