put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
