Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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