Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
