the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
