Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
