Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
this will be a night to untag.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
