Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I just blew my weed a kiss
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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