i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
