Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
