Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
