so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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