I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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