So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
