I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
