You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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