dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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