make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
