Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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