So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
In America we eat man semen.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
