TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He better not be in your backpack
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
