Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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