And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
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