the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Do vagina's smell?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I just got carded by a ten year old.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
