Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
if you like me you must not know who I am
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
