just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Randomize
