I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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