I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
How naked do you want me to be?
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