ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
