its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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