i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You ate ashes out of my bong
You did what with his pubic hair?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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