I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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