I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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