All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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