that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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