I need help removing her.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
