Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
