I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
