Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
