yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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