operation have a gay friend backfired
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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