The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
it was like eating out sand paper
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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